LIFE IS SLOWLY returning to a “new normal”.
But Life has changed, relationships have transformed; in some cases for the better, in some, for the worse, and things are unlikely to be exactly the way they were.
Has the lockdown been a good or a bad experience for you?
Many people have experienced dramatic emotional turmoil during this period of COVID-19.
Marriages have been put under enormous stress; families have experienced huge strains.
Children and adolescents have been denied access to their friends, causing anger and depression.
LIVING in a small space with nowhere to go has been frustrating.
For some, however, it has been a time to nurture relationships.
Couples have rekindled their love for one another, finding time to do things together.
Parents have been able to give more time to their children building a stronger and deeper understanding of their needs.
People have become more mindful of those in need, for the elderly or for their neighbours.
IN MANY CASES the community has pulled together.
It would be a wonderful world if this could be so for everyone, but sadly, for some people, having to spend time in close proximity with one another has identified differing opinions or desires.
SOME COUPLES might be experiencing different views on parenting or different views on their responsibilities.
This is often an area of imbalance for couples; with only one person generally shouldering the bulk of running the family, caring for children or elderly parents, cooking and cleaning, traditionally this was a female responsibility, but now not uncommon to be a male role.
COUPLE COUSELLING to improve communication and setting some mutually agreeable boundaries for themselves can be of huge benefit.
Couples may have found themselves constantly irritated with one another and feeling that their relationship is out of balance.
RESEARCH has shown that it is important for a couple to view the relationship in a more “objective, dyadic and contextualized” way rather than “one-sided and blaming” Benson, McGinn & Christensen (2012).
This means being able to view your relationship from a different perspective, so that you might see how misunderstandings can easily occur, while giving one another the opportunity to be heard.
INTIMACY may have been affected by not having any private time, which could lead to feelings of abandonment.
OR maybe the pressure to have more intimacy has created other feelings, such as emotional avoidance or the feeling of being used.
Perhaps during this period of lockdown, you feel that your teenage children have ganged up upon you?
You are at a loss as to how to move forward constructively to bring harmony back into your home.
Through FAMILY COUNSELLING you should be able to address the concerns that you are experiencing, giving both your children, and you, a voice through a third party, in a safe and caring environment.
The first goal in family counselling might be to set some boundaries and guidelines that will benefit the whole family.
A second goal might be to give your adolescent children more responsibility and set some ground rules so that they feel respected rather than chided.
The third goal might be to address any risks that your young adult children may be taking with regard to relationships, alcohol or drug abuse.
WHATEVER your situation is, it is essential that you seek help and talk to someone about the issues that are affecting your life.
If you chose to see a Counsellor, it is important to find someone with whom you can create a relationship of trust; a good therapeutic relationship relies on this.
The first session in counselling is often an opportunity to meet and have a cursory discussion before committing to any longer-term therapy.
Remember, your mental health is important to you and to the people around you.